HERIMONE GRANGER on my ALMA MATER

When news dropped that the lovely July 2011 Vogue covergirl Emma Watson was leaving Brown University due to reports of "bullying", I was a little shocked. In my heyday, celeb classmates were treated little less than demigods. A hush would fall over the crowd whenever one would roll up to the Rock library or to a houseparty, and a weird feeling of awe, respect, and resentment would boil up inside of you.

Leelee Sobieski was the celeb du jour at that time, and she ran that campus with her elusive, oddball nature. All the "New York kids" wanted to be her friends, she wanted to date my French boyfriend, and I was generally not amused. But after actually hanging with her a few times, I found she was really quite sweet, charming, quirky as f*ck, but ultimately lovely. She, like Emma, did not complete her studies at Brown--but that was too be expected. There were flops to be filmed, rock stars to date, missteps in her career to be made.

Emma is a different story, though.

After reading her Vogue article, I found her to be refreshingly sensitive: a young ingenue on the brink of self-discovery who should have easily found a home amidst the angst and reverie of my dear alma mater. I just find it hard to believe that Emma couldn't find a friend on that campus after saying things like this: "One of [Emma's] favorite classes at Brown was on the psychology of love. Far from being put off the idea, she remains an incurable romantic: 'I'm a feminist, but I think what people connect with in novels is the idea of an overpowering, encompassing love--and it being more important and special than anything and everything else."


I mean, for crying out loud, the girl is a self-declared feminist, her favorite class was the psychology of love, and she's complaining that she couldn't find a date on that campus?! Sounds like a typical Brown co-ed to me. She just needed an adorable but emotionally unavailable boyfriend in the MCM department, a class at R.I.S.D., and an invite to an electronic music show on a Friday night, and I think she would have been fine.

In my humble opinion, I think she should give Brown another college try.